I Don't Choose This!

Forgiven!

I cling to that word

Cling to the cross

I cling to my Savior

Trust in his blood

But the darkness presses

And the shadow falls

Will they engulf me again?

Will they bind me in their chains?

How long will I fight them?

How long 'till I fall?

They've already a foothold

They always have

I see them approaching

But where do I run?

I can't run from the shadows,

From what's in my mind

No matter how far I run

I can't leave them behind

I know what they say

(That nebulous "they")

"Just read your Bible,

Trust God, and pray."

And it sounds so good

If only it worked

If only the shadows

Saw God and fled

The shadows don't do that

That won't make them flee

And that won't keep the darkness

Away from my mind

I don't choose the darkness

I know that it comes

I know in the past

I've dragged myself down.

But not this time!

Not here and now!

I don't choose the shadows...

But my choice counts for naught

The darkness will come

Whether I will it or not.

So I cling to my Savior

I do read, trust, and pray

And I pray that this darkness

Lasts not very long

And won't sink me too far

Or bring me to blood

I hope it won't blind me

To Savior and Love

Or make me alone

In the midst of a crowd.

I trust you, my Father

That you're in control

That you won't send an evil

You won't help me escape

O God my Father!

The darkness is here!

It's smashing the gates

And battering the walls

And as the walls fall

And shadows rush in

I pray you won't

Leave me chained here

For long...